Star Wars Retrospective: Episode I The Phantom Menace

Hey Everybody,

It’s Paul

As you all know Star Wars is like a religion to me. It’s a sacred thing not just because of the magic of the films, but because of the incredible personal experiences I’ve had with friends and family while watching these movies. Obviously I’m counting down the days until Star Wars Episode VIII The Last Jedi opens and I wanted to do something special in anticipation of that film. So today is the beginning of a really cool series of articles that we’ll be posting once a week, from now until Star Wars The Last Jedi opens on December 15th. Each week a different contributor from World’s Best Media (myself included) will be writing a piece on a Star Wars film starting with Episode 1 and ending with Episode VII, right before the new film opens. Some of the articles are already finished and it’s been wonderful reading each one as it comes in. We’ll all get to experience these incredible movies through someone else’s eye. That’s what each of these articles will be about: the personal and emotional experience each of our writers had with a Star Wars film. I won’t be writing a long introduction to each article, but for the first piece I felt like I needed to explain what we’re doing.

So, first up is Star Wars Episode I The Phantom Menace written by my co-host on The World’s Best Podcast with Paul & Tim, Tim Cuff. Now, I know what you’re thinking: “ Tim Cuff? TIM CUFF?!!! He is no Star Wars fan! Heresy! Heresy, I say!” Believe me guys, I know where you’re coming from. But as soon as I started thinking about this doing this series of articles, I immediately thought of Tim for The Phantom Menace. First of all, Tim’s a great writer and secondly Tim has always had weird love and respect for Episode I. Now, he doesn’t let the movie off easy. Nor should he, because even the most devote fans of The Saga will admit that movie is a bit of a mess. But there are pieces of brilliance sprinkled throughout the film. After reading this article, you may agree with me when I say… The Force may be with Tim after all…

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EPISODE I: THE PHANTOM MENACE by Tim Cuff

Unlike most of the other writers carefully selected to write these Star Wars-related articles, I am not a Star Wars guy. Being “not a Star Wars guy,” why on earth would Paul choose me to kick this whole thing off and recap Episode I, a movie disliked by many fans and non-fans alike? Well to understand why Episode I is so special to me, let’s hop in the ole time machine and head back to 1999.

Back when the Red Sox were still cursed and Limp Bizkit was a respected musical act, a young Tim Cuff was 13. I don’t think any description from me can do justice to what a major movie event Episode I was. A Star Wars movie hadn’t come out since 1983 (yes, I understand the original trilogy was re-released in theatres in the 90s, doesn’t really count). This was going to be the first Star Wars movie with modern special effects (yes, I understand the original trilogy had some CGI added in when it was re-released in theatres in the 90s, doesn’t really count). This was going to kick off a new saga. This was going to explain where Darth Vader and Obi Wan came from. Young Tim went into this movie with the absolute highest of expectations, and unlike most fans, he was not disappointed.

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Let’s start off with Qui-Gon Jinn. If you don’t like Liam Neeson, I don’t like you. Liam Neeson is a boss now, and he was a fucking boss in 1999. Obi Wan, comparatively, is pretty lame in this movie (in terms of his storyline). He spends 50% of this movie inside of a parked ship waiting for everyone to get back, he has a weird short ponytail, and an even weirder super long side-of-his-head rat tail. In fact, other than the fact that they build Qui-Gon up so you can be devastated when he (18 YEAR OLD SPOILER ALERT) dies, I don’t understand why Obi Wan didn’t just replace Qui-Gon’s part in this movie. Anyways, I digress. Qui Gon is a quiet badass, akin to John Wick or Christian Bale in Equilibrium. He is a rebel who doesn’t blindly follow orders, he often disagrees with the Jedi. Anyone who tries to push back against those pompous galactic dickheads is cool with me. Although, to be fair, he was VERY mistaken thinking Anakin was the chosen one who will bring balance to the force. I can’t really stress enough how very, very wrong he was in this thought process.

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My favorite Qui-Gon moment, which epitomizes him as a character: During the final battle with Darth Maul, when the force field walls temporarily stop the action and the duelists are forced to take a short break, Qui-Gon sits on the ground and fucking mediates. How badass is that? Imagine you are in a to-the-death battle with a red and black horned demon with a laser bowstaff that can cut through metal walls, and you have a 30 second break. Could you calm yourself enough to mediate!? Well, sadly, it didn’t help much as he is shortly offed with a lightsaber to the stomach. I honestly find those force field walls brilliant, even watching it now, as it stopped Obi Wan from helping and also forced him to watch his best friend and mentor die. Young Tim was devastated by this. I truly did not see it coming, I thought Neeson was an actor I would get to see in the sequels to come (reading about this online wasn’t a thing for me at the time), and it really did hit home.

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As much as I loved Qui-Gon, I think the most memorable character in this movie is his killer: Jar Jar Binks. Sorry that was a typo, I meant Darth Maul. In a universe where the good guys are good and the bad guys are bad with no grey area in-between, there is no cooler bad guy than Darth Maul. I actually think it was a huge mistake to kill him off as from a purely visual standpoint he was the best character of the new trilogy. The black and red face (from my understanding the black is tattoos), the horns around the top of his head, the awesome ninja moves, and of course the fucking DOUBLE LIGHTSABER. After seeing the movie and loving Qui-Gon Jinn, when Young Tim went to Toys R Us after this movie did he reach for a green lightsaber? Nope, he went straight for the double red one. Who wouldn’t? My young mind was completely blown. There was no explanation given as to why suddenly the Jedis were ninjas that could almost fly (I guess “the force was stronger then”), but Young Tim didn’t care. I still find this 3-way swordfight to be the best in the entire series, old or new.

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The podracing scene was, in many people’s opinions, the highlight of the movie. It wasn’t for me, I always liked the lightsabering more, but nonetheless the race was a truly awesome scene that inspired several great video games. If I was Anakin’s mother, I probably wouldn’t let him enter the race to help out some random strangers. The race is, after all, so dangerous that only 2 racers even made it to the finish line and it seems several of the racers died. When I asked my mother as a boy, “Can I enter a death race so some people that broke down can buy a new part for their car?” she said no, which is why I am not currently living up to my potential.

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This is by no means a perfect movie, I will admit. The two biggest issues are Jar Jar and Anakin, but I will briefly tackle why they shouldn’t ruin the movie for everyone. Jar Jar is truly an awful character. Young Tim didn’t hate Jar Jar, he instead accurately thought of him as nothing. He was a nothing character. Under careful recent re-watching I realized Jar Jar could almost be entirely edited out of the movie with it making no difference. The only time Jar Jar contributes to the plot in any way is when he brings Obi Wan and Qui-Gon to the Gungan city. The only other moments he has are when he clumsily falls or has some annoying throwaway line. He was obviously included as a desperate attempt to appeal to children that miserably failed. As a child, I don’t remember any other children actually liking Jar Jar. However since he is such a minor, unimportant part of the movie you can try to just black him out and pretend he’s not there.

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Jake Lloyd as Anakin to me is worse than Jar Jar, because his dialogue with other characters (especially Natalie Portman) is so important to the movie. His acting is almost always painful, and I blame Lucas for this. Lucas could have casted another actor, and also Lucas is known for providing the cast almost no direction. Someone as inexperienced as Lloyd likely needed lots and lots of direction. I in no way blame Lloyd as he was a child. My only excuse for this (to help make this aspect of the series tolerable) is even in 1999 we all knew Anakin was going to be Vader by Episode 3. Due to this, it was forgone conclusion Episode I is the only time we would be forced to hang out with Jake Lloyd. I wanted to add quickly I truly do feel bad for Jake Lloyd as Episode I clearly ruined his life. If you google his name or watch any interviews with him, you will immediately understand what I am referring to.

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Episode I was quite polarizing when it came out; it received mostly mixed to negative reviews. However Lucas always said Star Wars is meant for children. Well Young Tim fucking loved it, so I guess to Lucas that is a win. Due to my contractual obligation with World’s Best Media to never speak negatively about Star Wars, I will end the review with that. After this movie we all poured some out for Qui-Gon and Maul, gone too soon, and prepared for the budding romance of Anakin and Natalie Portman. I mean, the scenes between them in the next movie can’t be as bad, right?

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Podcast Bonus: A Tribute To Spike…

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When Tim and I recorded our Buffy The Vampire Slayer podcast, we had A LOT to cover. It’s a dense show, with a complex mythology and fascinating cast of characters. Then there are the spinoffs and comic book continuations. Basically, it was a lot to cover.

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Arguably the 3 most important characters in the entire “Buffyverse” are Buffy, Angel, and Spike. We touched on Spike, but I felt like he deserved more. So knowing that Spike is one of his favorite fictional characters of all time, I asked Tim to record a mini bonus podcast all about Spike. If you haven’t seen the show, after listening to this, you’ll hopefully understand why we find him so compelling. Tim did a great job on this one, enjoy! Don’t forget, all of our podcast are also available on iTunes:

https://www.spreaker.com/episode/13115375

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Podcast: Paul & Tim’s Buffy The Vampire Slayer Episode!

Our Halloween themed podcast series continues as Tim and I talk about one of our favorite TV series, Buffy The Vampire Slayer. I’ve always felt that the title keeps some people from giving Buffy a chance, but it is without a doubt one the best TV shows of all time. If you’ve ever been curious about this weird show with a hot blonde who kicks the ever loving shit out of monsters or if you’re a longtime Buffy fanatic, this is a great podcast episode to dive into. We cover Buffy, the excellent spinoff Angel, and even discuss some of the canonical comic book continuations. Below I have some cast, monster, and character photos if you’ve never seen the show. Give it a listen! Also available on iTunes!

https://www.spreaker.com/episode/13101633

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(Buffy cast from left to right: Xander, Cordelia, Giles, Buffy, Angel, Willow, Oz)

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(Angel, who is 250 years old, creeping on 17 year old Buffy. He’s a creep!)

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(Vampire bad ass and Tim’s favorite character, Spike)

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(The Gentlemen: One of the most horrifying groups of monsters Buffy has faced. Christ, look at these guys. Creepy as fuck)

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(The Hero, The Slayer… Buffy Summers)

Oh The Horror!: A non-Horror Fans’s Journey (writer by Mike Cole)

Hey guys,

It’s Paul

Halloween and Horror have been the unofficial themes of the month at World’s Best Media. You can see that mainly reflected in our podcasts, but we’ve been trying to infuse the Halloween spirit everywhere. Tim and I (especially Tim) are big Horror Movie fans. So, Mike was kind enough to write up an article from his point of view as a non-Horror Movie fan. Halloween is coming soon, folks! Read below! Enjoy!

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Written by Mike Cole

​I’m a huge film buff, but I would also argue that I’m a bit of a film snob. I don’t think this is necessarily a great thing, arguably it is better to not have discerning taste, as then you can enjoy everything. Horror fans tend to be my role models in this way. Many horror fans, will go see ANY horror film that comes out. It’s why the genre is so successful, because every horror film seems to make money.
​Now, I’m aware that I sounded like a pretty big douchebag in that first paragraph, but I truly don’t mean it that way. It’s a good thing. There isn’t really any other genre that can stay as true as horror. Perhaps it’s because comedy is subjective, and tragedy is personal and cathartic, but horror, the shit that really scares us? That’s fairly universal.
​I imagine we can all understand the fear of someone or something lurking in a dark place, I read once that fear of the dark is an evolutionary characteristic developed to keep us safe. In fact, most of our fear probably stems from something deeper in our species’ history than comedy or drama would.
​Personally, I haven’t seen many horror films. For me, there have been three routes that have lead me to watching a horror movie: all my friends are going (only can think of 2 horror movies that my friends went to), it’s a prestige pic and a horror movie (this one is also pretty rare), and lastly everyone’s talking about it.
​Now, the two horror movies that I remember seeing with friends, are The Ring, which I thought was a pretty excellent film in its construction, and secondly The Human Centipede. The Human Centipede, came about from me seeing an article that this weird movie (which no one I knew had heard of yet) was going to be playing at The Coolidge Corner theater. I told my friend Slade about it, not because I wanted to see it, but because I thought the premise was so bizarre. Slade couldn’t get the idea of it out of his head, and made me go with him and a few friends to see it. This would end up being probably the most authentic ‘horror-going’ experience of my life. I don’t remember being scared, but I remember being grossed out, and cringing a lot. At one point, I remember thinking there was a good chance I was going to throw up in my popcorn bag. Seeing The Human Centipede, disturbed me enough, that I had at least a night or two of trouble sleeping. It was not an experience I wanted to replicate.
As I mentioned, prestige pics (basically movies that may be considered for awards) don’t tend to also be horror films, but there are a few slight exceptions. It may not be fair to consider them ‘horror’ but definitely scary/suspense/thrillers. For this list, as far as I’m aware it tends to be the works of Alfred Hitchcock, and The Silence of the Lambs. You’re probably aware of Psycho, Vertigo, and The Birds, at least on some level. They’re well crafted, and perhaps in their time they were scary, but not really anymore, but they’re still enjoyable. The Silence of the Lambs is perhaps remembered for being scarier. People think of Hannibal Lecter as terrifying, although personally, I found the character of Buffalo Bill to be far scarier. The voice of actor Ted Levine (which nearly ruined the show Monk for me because of this film), who played Jame Gumb aka Buffalo Bill, is terrifying along with his erratic behavior makes him far more frightening than the caged and calculating Lecter.
Lastly, I mentioned that I have watched some horror films based on hype. For this category, I have watched the original Halloween, which I didn’t really find scary, but thought was a great film. I think part of the problem with this was just the age of the film. I saw it in the last five years, and Jamie Lee Curtis is so much more a part of my knowledge, that she doesn’t have some of the nameless/faceless quality that comes with many horror movie victims/survivors.
After hearing about all of the hype, I also saw the first three Saw films. I think the first movie, wasn’t really too scary, but ultimately was well made, and enjoyable, the following two, I found to be increasingly scary, while decreasing in quality. Again, the fear factor to me, could come down to the fact that Carey Elwes is one of the main victims in the first, and I know who he is. Also the second film has a pit of syringes, and needles are one of my worst fears.
From the little bit that I have indulged in the horror genre, I’ve been able to see that there is a lot to be enjoyed about it, but I am not sure that I have the patience to sit through the terrible to find the divine, but I think not enjoying the ‘b-movies’ of the genre is only to my detriment, and I’m not advocating for any of you to do the same.

Movie Review: Tim Reviews Happy Death Day!

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(This is not a picture from the film “Happy Death Day”, Tim accidentally sent it to me as an attachment with his reviews. I wouldn’t read too much into it… I’m sure this girl is… fine. Yuuup, I bet she’s… she’s just fine… Fuck. Alright I’ll call the police. It should be me.)

Hey, guys

Paul here to introduce Tim’s kick ass review of the new horror movie “Happy Death Day”. Ignore all that stuff above and just listen to his GREAT review! Also available on ITunes:

https://www.spreaker.com/episode/13049880

What I’d Like To See: MCU Phase 4

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Thor: Ragnarok comes out in a couple weeks, and is being called ‘the most anticipated movie of the fall,’ and I must agree it, looks awesome. This puts us at about the half-way point of the MCU Phase 3 (I believe Avengers 4 is the final film slated for this phase). What is going to happen with this phase has largely happened, and so I want to turn to speculation for Phase 4.
The phase one movies were largely introductions. We got the Avenger anchor characters (Thor, Cap, Iron Man, and Hulk) setup, and it culminated in The Avengers. Phase two was about expansion, in phase two we had movies like Guardians of the Galaxy who were the Avengers in space, and Ant-Man who is a West-Coast Avenger, as well as filling out the world-building of 3 of the originals (no Hulk movie for so many reasons). And so far Phase 3 has been letting our toys play together. We’ve had Captain America: Civil War (which is really an Avenger’s movie in many ways except they’re split) and Tony Stark is almost a secondary protagonist in Spider-Man: Homecoming, Thor: Ragnarok looks as if it could be called Thor and Hulk against the universe. These mash-ups have been great, and Thor and Hulk look like they’ll be the up there as well.
Here is the thing you need to understand about Marvel’s process (as best as I can understand it): they started us off with characters that may have been B-list to the masses, but they knew wouldn’t require much to make them appeal to people who don’t give a shit about comics (while staying true to the comics), then as time as progressed, as the audience has become more hooked, they’ve brought us into a cinematic comic-book world unlike anything else. They started introducing us to less traditional movie-going experiences, but more traditional comic book experiences. Things are weird, and overall the audience is loving it—can you imagine when Iron Man came out in 2008 if someone had told you Marvel would make a movie about a talking raccoon and a sentient tree that you would have been excited? Maybe if you’re reading on this site I guess, but overwhelmingly I think the answer would be no for those of us not delving into the weird world of comic books.
For Phase 4, we’ve had the cross-overs, we’ve had the mash-ups, we’ve had the weird, now it’s time to get to ‘the replacements.’ By the beginning of Phase 4, the franchise will be ten years old, many of the actors will have been in for 6 or more movies, and it will be time to start changing the line-up. It’s not necessarily what many want as a viewing audience, but it is what the business will begin to dictate, and honestly, I think there are some great potential options for it.
Comic books, unlike movies or TV, don’t have actors they need to replace, and yet they often do replace the characters. Right now in the movies Steve Rogers is Captain America, but both Bucky Barnes (aka The Winter Soldier) and Sam Wilson (aka The Falcon) have both ascended to the role of Cap. Most of the superheroes in comic books have been multiple characters, and it can rejuvenate them, it can change perspective, and I think it can do that for the MCU.
You might be thinking, “I don’t want anyone but Chris Evans playing Captain America,” but just because he doesn’t play Cap doesn’t mean he can’t return as Steve Rogers, or even later to return as Cap if the storyline allows it. This option frees up the actors a lot, because while the paychecks are nice, for the Chris’s (Evans and Hemsworth, and maybe even Pratt) it’s a lot of physical work to keep in their superhero conditions.
As it is, in Homecoming, we basically get Tony Stark having outsourced many of the Iron Man duties to autopilot, and so I think there is nothing that says they have to kill off the characters, or recast, just replace. We need an Iron Man, and a Cap on the team, but do we need Steve Rogers or Tony Stark?
With Ant-man, we’ve already seen the second iterations introduced, largely because Hank Pym (played by Michael Douglas) is too close of a character to Tony Stark, whereas Scott Lang (Paul Rudd) is a much different character.
The richness of comic books in adaptation is that there is so much source material much of it conflicting, but all kind of co-existing, and it allows the filmmakers to do whatever they want. It solves a couple of problems that I think are going to occur, one is that inevitably if these films continue going, there will need to be recasting, but this could allow a buffer space, and a shifting of the world/tone to allow new actors in. The second issue it solves is it uses fatigue on the part of actors playing the same characters to further world-build. It also allows different kind of conflicts, the conflict between characters not trusting a new Cap, or a new Thor, or whomever needs to be replaced creates conflict, and this has been Marvel’s strength is the conflict between protagonists, not the conflict between protagonist and antagonist.
Clearly, Kevin Feige knows what he’s doing, he’s been slowly sucking us all into a far less generic cinematic franchise, one that does resemble comic books more than traditional films in a lot of ways. So perhaps this will be the eventual route he takes, and if it isn’t I’ll be along for the ride, because on the whole he’s been getting it right, but I suspect if the audience keeps going along as he pushes us further and further, we’re going to see these kinds things happening, and I personally look forward to an MCU in which characters are replaced and not actors (for as long as possible).

BOOK REVIEW: The Man From The Train:The Solving Of A Century-Old Serial Killer Mystery (Reviewed by Tim Cuff)

Hey guys, I just want to make a quick comment because this is the first time we’ve had him write an article for the site, but this is an excellent book review by Tim Cuff, who is of course my cohost on The World’s Best Podcast with Paul & Tim. Tim is a great writer and this is a great review. Enjoy!

– Paul

THE MAN FROM THE TRAIN Written by Bill James

(Reviewed by Tim Cuff)

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If you’re familiar with Bill James, it’s more than likely because of baseball. He is the father of sabremetrics (basically, the use of statistics and analyzing real data to draw conclusions, as opposed to using gut feelings and eyeball observations). Anyone familiar with modern sports is aware of this word, a word that Bill James invented. Currently he is the Senior Advisor of Baseball Operations for the Boston Red Sox. Luckily for Paul, however, this review isn’t about baseball. Bill James and I have another passion, darker and less mainstream than baseball: serial killers.

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Photo of Bill James

The Man from the Train deals with an extremely prolific (100+, yes not a typo, 100+ murders) serial killer that most of us have never heard of. This is mostly because he committed crimes in the early 1900s, which I will elaborate on in a later paragraph. His modus operandi is as follows: he would take a train to a random small town, find a house extremely close to the railroad tracks, find an axe on the family property, hide in a barn or other out building, break in through a window in the middle of the night, and kill the entire family while they slept (usually saving a young girl for last). Once completed he would hop back on the train, and would be hundreds of miles away by the time the bodies were discovered. He was methodical, vicious, but most importantly random. This randomness helped him in a time where there were no criminal profilers and no one had heard of the term “serial killer.” One small town would almost never hear the news from another small town 100 miles away, and it took many years for anyone to connect the murders.
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Photo of an actual murder site taken shortly after the murders

The book focuses on two major aspects of his crimes: the crimes themselves, and the shockwaves resulting from the crimes. The former can be tough to read about. However Bill James makes no bones about it: this guy is a scumbag. James doesn’t try to get in his head, or imagine what it is like to be him, or speak about his methodology in almost admirable ways. James repeatedly states what a disgusting monster he is, and in an interview mentions he is “glad the sonofabitch is dead” as the publishing of this book would likely give him pleasure. But the Man from the Train wasn’t BTK or Zodiac. He didn’t want to be caught, he didn’t send taunting letters to the police; he just wanted to kill people. James doesn’t elaborate on the more ghastly parts of his crimes. He sort of glosses over the gory details, and more importantly he doesn’t discuss at length the sexual nature of the crimes (the killer seems to have a fascination with young girls I won’t go into here).

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Photo from a logging camp. James believes the murderer was a logger, hence his propensity to use an axe.

Some of the more interesting parts of the book, however, are how society reacted in the early 1900s. Police investigations were extremely limited. A small town police force in Kansas from 100 years ago isn’t exactly chock full of Frank Pembletons (kudos to anyone who gets that reference). Most of the time local police would have to hire private investigators, who were for-profit detectives that could be anywhere from intelligent, to inept, to out-right conmen. In 1910 no one could seem to wrap their brain around the idea of a serial killer with no motive. Almost always a neighbor, or family member, or local nutcase, or local minority (almost always black) would instantly be blamed for the crime. Even when some of the murders finally were linked, police still searched for some sort of personal connection with at least one of the victims. Some of the resulting stories and trials following a murder are nothing short of ridiculous. Many people were imprisoned, executed, or lynched due to false accusations.
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Most importantly, though not a spoiler, James (by his own admission) accidentally discovers who the killer is. James spent 7 years researching the crimes. He didn’t seek to write a book such as Jack the Ripper: Case Closed by Patricia Cornwell. That book was solely written for the purpose of solving Jack the Ripper. James had no intention he would be solving anything, until he discovers mistakes the killer made. Eventually working his way backwards he finds “the first crime,” a crime of a not-yet-experienced murderer. Mistakes were made, he was identified, and narrowly escaped the police. This escape unfortunately led to the deaths of 100 more people.

The downsides to this book, if there are any, is that it is quite long (I read it on a Kindle so it’s hard to tell, but I believe it’s over 400 pages). For a nonfiction book that can be quite a row to hoe. Reading about the 30th murder (almost all of the murders are discussed at length), for example, can be a little tedious. Eventually I felt, “Okay I get it. He killed this family too, in the exact same fashion. Let’s move on.”

If you are a fan of true crime, especially serial killers, or have a historic interest in our criminal justice system, I highly recommend this book. I admire James’s no-nonsense writing style. He will state his opinion and not be afraid to say, “This is my opinion, though I could not convince a skeptic of this.” It definitely is of a darker nature, and isn’t for everyone. If this isn’t the type of story for you, I recommend the more upbeat Curious George and the Birthday Surprise, for which I will have an upcoming review.

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